Looking for that Second Wind

They say that when you run you will grow weary and then, out of nowhere comes your second wind which carries you for another good portion of time. As you run more and more, your first wind gets longer and longer, before the second one comes. This is just one more reason to practice running and exercising. So, while I have not run at all this week because I am working in Portland, I am still looking for that second wind. My heart is growing weary and tired, I feel fatigue trying to attack from behind and my patience/ tolerance level wearing thin. However, I am digging deep and pulling it out, it's that second wind. Here it goes! I will push forward, put on my smile and face life with vigilance today. I am not going to let the weakness of the other runners, or in this case, the complaining of the people around me, effect my life and where I am at. I will not compare myself to them or look at them with negativity. Actually, I am not going to look at them at all because they are super discouraging. I will keep running, laying aside every encumbrance.
While I am giving myself the pep talk, my life feels the way my legs did at mile 11 in the last half marathon, weary and heavy, hard to move, yet I have no choice to keep going. Life is coming at me, the distance in the run is still there, so I may as well put one foot in front of the other, and attempt to do it well.
I am off to go locate my second wind, wishing that it was like a brightly colored easter egg so that it would be easier to find.

Speed Work and Hills

Today I attempted some speed work and hills in my workout. Both were hard, horrible and left me unable to breathe. I decided that this type of exercises brings out the worst in my mind and leaves me with no question about the sin nature inside of me. I want to say things and think things that should not be. Doesn't God's word say to flee from temptation? Maybe I should abandon the hill's and speed because of what they produce. It takes every once of self control to stay on task and to do it somewhat gracefully. This morning I had to leave the gym after taking a shower, just so I could simmer down. Oh gracious, will anything about this get easier? I just don't want to be miserable as I run the half with my sister. Help!!!

OH Boy!

OH boy.... Three months ago I didn't think I would ever finish 13.1 miles. Running caused the most horrible things to come from me, not just sweat and toxins, but swear words and evil thoughts. When I run with Garret, he wants to talk and have conversations, that's good, I take the time to practice my listening skills. Are you kidding me? My grandma always said that if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. So why would I talk and run at the same time?
Running now just makes me hurt, maybe not while I am doing it so much anymore, but the after effects are lasting. My knees at night yell at me and tell me to stop. My hips are in conspiracy and decide to let that muscle stay tight, after all, if it ever got better I might keep going (I don't think they want that.) However, with all this stuff going on, yesterday I told Katie that if she would walk/ run a marathon, I would too. I can't believe that I let such things out of my mouth! I did think about it, and the walk part sounds marvelous. That's the problem with running, it makes thoughts you would never think, run through your head.

Rest

As Recovery week came in like a thunder cloud, I took it in full force. I decided to take the 7 days to contemplate rest, read race magazines that talked of the importance of rest and the symptoms that let you know when you need rest. There are two basic types of rest. There is the one that most of us are familiar with and savor, the lack of going anywhere or doing anything. This classifies as a real day off. There is also active rest. This is the "rest" that means you are still active, but keeping the heart rate low. Most of the time athletes think that they are actively resting when, in reality, they are still trying to push themselves, just not as much as usual. Resting that is beneficial is not the time to push, but enjoy. For me this would be a nice, easy jog down my favorite trail, watching t.v. while doing the elliptical or taking Barnabas for a walk.
I think of when Jesus says, "Come to me, all who are weary, and I will give you rest." It's a tranquility. No matter what is going on, there is a sense of comfort. Rest implies that there is something to rest from. When you are an athlete, your muscles are doing their best work as you allow them to rest and rebuild. It's a necessary thing for you to be stronger. It's also good for your heart. Therefore, spiritually, it must work the same way. The rest that Jesus gives must be good for us and we must need it. Our society says push, go, do. Yet, in the long run, rest is a vital part of life. The more I run, the more I understand my body and when it needs a break. I guess you would say that I am more in tune with what my body is telling me. A greater appreciation for the Creator comes from trying to be sensitive to my physical needs so that I can be a good steward of the health that he has given me.
Rest, it's an important piece for getting stronger, and I am going to make the most of it.

So Sore, But So Worth It!

Today I am incredibly sore, and rather it is from running, falling off the horse or a combination thereof, it doesn't matter, I am sore. I was contemplating how awesome it is though that our bodies tell us when to rest, take a break and just be careful. I am not going to quit running, despite what some may say, because I have some very specific goals of why I am doing this. However, I will need to take it easy and do some recovery days to get myself back in the game. I was reading in the runner's magazine just yesterday about the importance of rest days. Sometimes that is through active recovery and sometimes that is just what it says, rest. For me, having reasons and goals for my running has motivated me when nothing else would. It is in these times of rest and soreness that I reevaluate why I am doing this, and at this point, for me, I am right on target. It's not about how far I run (although I chose half marathons because they seemed so far out of my league), but how and why I am doing it. My reasons for running are the same today as they were yesterday when I started the race and are as follows:
1) Physical Discipline reminds me that I need to be of Spiritual Discipline.
*I have to get myself up and moving to be ready for the next running event. It is the same in my spiritual life, if I don't get myself in the Word, how am I going to be prepared when the next curve ball is thrown my direction.
2) Fitness helps me Focus and Have Fun.
*When my energy has an outlet, then I can prioritize my life, get things done in a timely fashion. When someone asks me if I want to go with them on a hike, a jog down the river, etc. I am ready. I want to be a good steward of this time that I have on this earth and running is a reminder of that.
3) Social Reasons
*It gives me another outlet or way to connect with people. I have many stories of how relationships have deepened, how hearts have been touched and how I have made new friends, simply through running and fitness. This is an avenue that I can use to tell others about Jesus. Whether you are already an athlete or I can relate with you on the "I want to be an athlete, but it's painful" we probably have something in common.
4) Lifestyle Change.
*As I run more and run longer, I am more aware of the importance of how running for me is a lifestyle change. I am conscientious of the foods that I am eating, the amount of water that I am drinking, how much and when to exercise or eat. I realize that what I put in, effects my energy and how much I can put out. Is it not the same with the Word of God? What goes in my mind and body, effects my spiritual output.
5) Last but not Least, I don't want to be fat and lonely.
* I would love to lose some inches doing this becuase I hear that running helps make you lean. However, I have yet to see the effects of that and I have been at this for three and a half months, run two half marathons and have changed my eating habits. Oh well, maybe it will come eventually, for I know that I am more fit. As for the loneliness. I still spend much of my time alone, have not gone on any dates with amazing men, but am learning to be content being alone vs. being alone AND lonely. Fortunately I do have my dog and horse. I am more confident and content, this I know. (maybe I use my running to ward off fears and anxiety because its a safe place to talk to God...hmmm....)

Anyway, those are the five reasons, and for now I am sticking with them. Due to the recuperating muscles in my body and the stiffening of the joints as I sit here, it looks like I should go for a walk despite the wind and rain out there.

The Second Half.

There's a second, as if the first wasn't good enough. Today was the day for Race for the Roses in Portland, OR. There were almost 5,000 people signed up, but only about 1800 did the half marathon. I was a little sore going into it from falling off less than 48 hours previously. I couldn't do anything on Saturday, so it was mostly cold turkey. The week before my first half marathon I drank tons of water, was super conscious about what I was eating, exercised at all the right times, etc. This time I stood in an arena, only ran about 7 miles this week and 14 the week before. I rode horses and fell off, but took lots of Ibuprofen an hour before the start time. The first eight miles went super! I made it up the long steep hil and came flying down on the other side. I loved the view of the city, the sound of the DJ's and the spectators on the side. However, at mile 8 someone says to me, "We have already gone eight miles, we only have five to go." When I heard "the only five to go" I felt Debbie downer inside of me hit a wall. I immediately slowed my pace (subconsciously of course.) The second downer moment was at mile 11 when I overheard someone tell their friend that we weren't far, but just had to run all the way down to Salmon ST. and turn around. All I heard was "Run ALL THE WAY down to Salmon St." I didn't even know where Salmon St. was, but it sounded further than I wanted to think about. Actually, by this time, I had less than two miles to go. I pressed on. I did have to stop twice to stretch. My legs were so tight and my muscles were tired. However, I could breathe!!! I relate this moments to that in my spiritual life. At the time these things were said, especially the first one, I was feeling strong and confident, so sure of my time and energy. However, when I listened to outside sources, one wasn't even directed at me, I found myself feel heavy, discouraged and wondering if this was all worth it. The lesson I learned was this: don't listen, don't allow yourself to be swayed by outside sources and your strength must come from within.
On the course I met a young lady that I shared alot of similarities with, so that was kind of cool. I sprinted at the end towards the finish line.... and I mean, for Jessica, it was fast. My hips, back and knees hurt immensely right now. I am going to go to bed. Good night.